I wrote a couple paragraphs. They were about my fears. My fears about next semester. Nervousness for school to start. Anxieties about new roommates. I got it all out. And, well... it's gone now.
Because I realized that none of that is important -- not now, not ever. I know that I'm nervous for everything to change, but things have to change, and they will whether I'm prepared for them to or not. Life does not wait. I know that what's most important in my life right now is my ability to embrace whatever comes next. Both my happiness and my inner peace depend on my willingness to do that.
Right now, everything is in motion. I have many decisions that are just kind of floatin' around up there, waiting for me to give them more attention. I do not intend to try to make these decisions now or even relatively soon. I'm just waiting, and as antsy as that makes me, it's what I've decided to do. It's what I feel I am supposed to do. I have no definitive plans for the future, and as someone who always has her life planned out, that terrifies me. Truly. But, you know, I have to be okay with that. And I will be.
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| Found this on Pinterest a while back. Always applicable. |
Everything will be fine. Life is good; God is good. And things will work out in the end -- probably sooner, actually. I have complete faith in that. Until then, I'll just keep going, keeping an eye out for my blue skies. They're on their way. Merry Christmas. :)
I have found that the more I try to plan my life, the less it goes according to that plan. I just try to lose my impulse to want to CONTROL everything (the toughest thing in the world for me!) and enjoy the ride. Yuck. I wonder if I'll ever learn that lesson? Meanwhile, I have found that my life's theme song comes from The Rolling Stones (not my favorite band by any means, but these words are awesome): You don't always get what you want; you get what you need.
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